Recent Posts
Join My Mailing List

The 3 awarenesses

I don’t know if it is because I’m female, a woman in her 60’s, who has had time to think, or because of my training and experience (I’ve been a student of ontology for at least 3 decades) but it occurs to me that the world is made up of 3 big-picture, over-arching emotional awarenesses.

Awareness 1: The Self

Awareness 2: The Other

Awareness 3: The World

For many of us, from a very early age, we are conditioned not so much to be aware of ourselves – Awareness 1 - but because of fear, extreme expectations, or out of a sense of survival, we are conditioned to be aware of The Other – Awareness 2.

If our parents gave us any sense of feeling *less than*, intended or unintended feelings of abandonment or rejection, disrespect, feeling dismissed or otherwise less than worthy, we found it safer to focus our attention on the awareness of The Other so as not to rock the boat, bring attention to ourselves, invite possible bodily harm, experience emotional upset, etc.

In other words, some of us were negatively catapulted away from exploring and understanding the true nature of ourselves into a confusing and misunderstood world of attempting (and often failing) to understand The Others.

Many of us have grown into adulthood with upsetting feelings of something is missing or anxious feelings that we “should be doing something, but don’t know what”. I’ve spoken with many women over the past 3 decades who have a sense, a deep sense within, that there must be more to life. There is.

There is more, and what is missing is a sense of Awareness 1 – The Self. What I’ve noticed more than anything else is that most of us know intellectually who we are (likes/dislikes, etc.) and we know conceptually who we are (mom, student, artist, etc.) but most of us are not very aware of who we are emotionally, the true, authentic self.

Who we are emotionally is the culmination of what we most want, desire, crave, feel and have tendencies for as WE would like them and not as others (parents, bosses, spouses, etc.) would want for us. An example would be someone who works in the medical industry because family member(s) said it’s the best place for her when in actuality being a librarian, artist, engineer feels like where she’d much rather be but is too afraid or uncomfortable to go against The Others, so she stays where she is emotionally unhappy because she has not learned how to honor her own sense of self.

And how could she have? Most of us were not taught this important and critical component of what makes us truly happy in life.

What is one to do?

My suggestion is to begin to learn about who you (the individual you came on earth to be) who you are. I mean set out to discover your strengths, gifts, talents and skills. Find out what makes your heart sing, your soul soar, your face smile. This is the beginning of self-discovery.

There are probably a million places to begin, but if you don’t know where and you’d like a place to start, feel free to download my special guide called Fall in Love With Your Life Again, by clicking here.

Thank you!