Hello Beautiful Ones,
Today I declare my own Independence
Have you ever known someone so stuck in their own little world, that no matter how many times you request them to respect your space, or ask them to knock before walking through the door, or beg them not to interrupt you while you are working, but they just keep doing it? Have you ever known someone that makes up excuses which justifies to them to continue to do the behavior because they've convinced themselves that their excuse is valid, regardless of how ridiculous the excuse is?
I've had that person in my life and it is so unbelievably painful to discuss these issues, get agreements from the person that they won't do it any more, promises that was the last time, only to have them repeat the unwanted behavior again and again. On some level there's been shock and surprise, a sense of deceit, a bewilderment of them not keeping their word. On another level there has been the feeling of betrayal, anger and frustration at having to go over the same conversation again and again and again.
And then there is illumination and liberation! For nearly a year, in close quarters, I've had this happen. Over and over and over again there has been the conversation of respecting certain specific requests, and over and over and over again these requests have been dismissed in favor for the excuses made and justified. I have felt stuck, in victim mode, frustrated, have had some health issues (because I stayed stuck), and found that even though I would get back to happy as soon as I could, I was losing something inside, slipping into less happy, somehow putting this person's needs ahead of my own. Why is this happening? What can I do? And I started to really look at it. I began to realize that I had allowed this to go on for too long. I had given up my power, my strength, my inner sense of self-love, my self-care, and I had allowed another to determine what happens. Yes, I *allowed* it. I don't like these feelings, and I don't like me when I allow this.
And so, today I declare my independence. I'm changing things. I'm moving my space to better serve me. I'm removing myself from the irritation. I'm not asking the other person to do anything different. I'm doing something different. I'm doing something that is the best for me. And you know what? All the little cells in my body feel better, happier, lighter, and more full of peace. There is no story about whether what I'm doing is right or wrong, no sense of justification, or convincing .... nope, I'm just sensing how I feel.
True to me.
I am enjoying this sense of peace within.
My wish for you, beautiful ones, is that when something outside of you is feeling yucky on the inside of you, that you pay attention (feel it) and realize that is the inner you giving clues to the outer you (requesting you to imagine better), and that the outer you has the ability and potentiality (attract it, there are an infinite number of possibilities) to make physical, emotional, mental, spiritual changes that allow you to feel that you've made the right decision. Not justifications, excuses, or contracted feelings, not prideful, arbitrary or combative feelings, but true independence and liberation for the inside of you. You'll know it is right, by how you feel.
Huge hugs and big love,
P.S. Wanting to give credit to the image's author, but have no idea who did it.
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